I don't get it?

When I am asked " How's your day?", I receive the oddest looks when I respond,"Just waiting for the endtimes!"

Then I get the question,"What makes you think you're going to Heaven?"
To which I respond," Why do you believe that we will be in the same area?" 
Which brings me to the title of my blog.

The Endtimes Lemonade Stand is the refreshing last bastions before my foreverafter. 

Do you ever have those days when you just want to tell your:Boss, Boyfriend or general annoying jackass coworker to go to Hades?

We all have those dazed days when we just want to pull the covers over our head and wait for it to get better.
Some call it depression, some call it frustration and some call it a good time to start drinking in the morning.
I call it tired of the Bogus Shananigans of people trying to pull the wool over your eyes. People; like the guy trying to sell you soomething over the phone, or at your door.
The telemarketer who calls right at dinner time or just before you get into your shower/bath.
The boss that asks if you would stay late for the 5th time in a row or work your 6th Saturday shift.
Always promising to pay you back or give you a 3 day weekend.
The coworker who needs your special expertise to do a project, then spends the rest of the evening making dinner plans on the phone!
    
Have you ever had those days were you feel like you are the only one that read the Manual? What ever the maual is, you read the thing cover to cover in English, Spanish--even Korean?

Yet, you are treated as if you have a glittered nailed thumb in the middle of your forehead!

The endtimes is the exact moment when God calls Bull Shit.
When the collective have that final "aha!" moment,before going to their eternal home. They then proceed to be your friend, seek your alliance or ask for mercy. It's like the porch light went on and they get caught on their behavior.

I try to surround myself with good vibes. I believe that in the end, whatever I surrounded myself in life, I will be surrounded by in afterlife. I want to be able to  look God square in the eye, and not have him call Bull Shit!
So enjoy the juice that you serve at the party you host in life, because you will be drinking it forever, wherever you end up.

CHEERS!!

the oscar goes to...

Greetings  Readers,
Welcome to my 2012 Oscar rehash / re bash forum.
Ah the 84 Academy Awards ceremony! It was a beautiful show.
The fashion, the jewels , the bright shiny star sparkle couples.
Out of the nine films up for Best Picture, I realized I actually viewed  five of them!


I figured that the Academy would end this fabulous month of Black History, by giving the two top Actress spots to Viola Davis and Octavia Spencer. Octavia got Best Supporting Actress, and Viola got robbed.
Yes, Yes Yea, Streep was probably deserving of her Oscar for The Iron Lady; but, the movie was her portraying a historical figure. You nail the accent, the affectations and all that jazz, and people go ooh and aah.


Mrs. Davis added heart and soul to her character; of a woman, who not so long ago was seen  not as property, but less than property. Something handed down from mother to daughter like a heirloom.


It was wonderful to see Meryl walk over to Viola and shake her hand.
As if she knew that this was her True Contender.
There have been concerns over Billy Crystal's appearance in black face with Justin Bieber.
Yet no one caught the Monkey reference made by Fred Willard.
(He hoped that Gone With the Wind, would have some Flying Monkeys in it.)
Oops, really. Come on REALLY!!


Yes Virgina, JLo was showing some nipple.  The bodice of her plunging neckline didn't show real nipple. It just exposed some of the areola on her left boob.
She had it while standing in front of Tim Gunn, she still had it when she presented with Cameron Diaz. It Screamed at you!


Lastly, the boobish behavior of some of the presenters!
WTF was up with those two chicks from Bridesmaids? Playing a drinking game with Martin Scorsces' name. Really?
Then there was the JLo and Diaz's back to the camera comedy.What? Oh Oh Oh! and last but not least the preening stance of Angelina... Why?

Is new Hollywood so ass backwards, that entertaining the masses has come down to Schick.
In 1929, the Oscars ran for 50 minutes. It was probably good.
Reason being, those folks knew how to entertain!
Hollywood needs to be occupied. It is producing crap stars and crap cinema.

Tuesday night special

This blogging is difficult. You have to find interesting things to write on.
Since this Lenten season is upon me and I decided to give up booze, bitching and my bad attitude. This blog is even more difficult!

So last night I spent time with my sister. We went and saw Michael Jackson's Immortal tour. A Cirque de Soliel extravaganza. It was cheesy like pizza. I neither laughed or cried. The giant shoes and glitter glove was over the top Tacky.
I felt totally robbed of my money, and wanted to cry foul at the top of my lungs.

I will end this post like my Tuesday night ended, anti-climatic !

Aunt Flow sez!

   Looking at it from a woman's point of view. What's mine is mine. What's your's is mine and anything we acquire together is up for grabs.
So, that said, my vagina is not up for political or religious debate. It is not a platform for men to argue over! Be it the pill, abortion or if it spends the rest of it's life with another vagina. 
 Come on, men seem to be obsessed with my reproductive responsiblities. They feel that they have the right to chime in on how I get my birth control, pap smears or day after pills. Yet, these same men cannot see their way to control date rape pills, pediphile priest and general jackass dead beat daddies. 
  The only thing that men have in common; with my vagina, is just like me they passed through one. Hey Stupid, if you want to have a say on a woman's reproductive organs. I suggest that once a month you pull and replace the the plug for her. Keep it like you would keep your first car...oh wait Women are no longer property. So FUCK OFF!!

5. 4. 3. 2. 1. Ignition!

Hello new viewer,
Welcome to my world. Today is Thursday, Feb. 16th 2012.
We are post Valentines and approaching Lent.
The sun shone today and the weather was beautiful, yet I still found time to bitch.
Where does one begin?
Since I am new at this blogging thing, I will start small.( don't want ya'll reporting me to the FBI)
The Pope, the President and the Political debacle that is brewing into our 2012 election year.
It looks like this blog is going to be an iceberg....small and unassuming on the surface, a catatrosphic nightmare in the deep dark waters. Fasten your seat belts folks... its go time!!